But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
