Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
