Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
it's like heaven, but drunker
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
