both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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