I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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