You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
