Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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