so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
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