his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize