Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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