Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
The air was thick with penises
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Randomize
