my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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