Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
