exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
