i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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