Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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