Nicole vs. Life
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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