that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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