You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
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