Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
that's an acceptable place to lick
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize
