i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
