Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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