you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
