Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show youâ€
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