I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Randomize
