Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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