I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
These tits shall not be calmed
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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