I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
