I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
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