Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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