Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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