mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
