i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
