its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
