Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize