How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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