Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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