She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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