What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
