Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize