But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
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