we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize