ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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