Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
