maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
