I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
She's the barista slut.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
