that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize