i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I deserve this hangover.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
