I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
