worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
stop calling my apartment porn island.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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