So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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