I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
